Sarah Klebo, the director of human resources at Fitness Formula Clubs, shares advice on responding to conflicts effectively and empathetically.
I am fascinated by the behaviors of humans. I’ve studied behavioral science formally in school and informally by reading many books, watching TV shows and having real life interactions. I feel my superpower is understanding humans and why they do what they do. This gift allows me to get into the mess of typical human resources (HR) work and untangle it until we get to the core of the issue.
It’s not always fun and it’s definitely not always easy, but it’s always worth it. My experience over the last 20-plus years has led me to believe that we struggle as humans, especially in the more nuanced situations in the workplace. It is my honor to help others who don’t have the same superpower.
I am going to guide you on “how to human” through helpful, practical and maybe a little funny advice on what to do in the workplace when interactions don’t go exactly how you think they should. Let’s get into it and talk about it and figure it out together.
Taking the Time to Listen
Our employees are our most valuable asset. We owe it to them as leaders to create a workplace that empowers them to truly belong and be their best selves.
For Part 1 of “How to Human” I’d like to share a recent, although not uncommon, interaction I had with an employee. This employee had recently been terminated and wanted to talk to me about how it came to be that he was terminated and all the problems leading up to it. Such interactions are generally not productive because what the employee wants is for me to give them their job back. I don’t find that going against what was decided at the club level to is supportive — barring any legitimate wrongdoing. So, what I did was just listen to him. It took him 40 minutes to say what he needed to say. As a human myself, I felt empathy for how it all went down. After he said his peace, I asked him a few questions, explained basic procedural items, thanked him for his time with us and wished him well.
It’s natural for our defenses to rise as we are hearing all the “bad things” about the company we work for, but in my experience, being defensive never works out well. So instead of proving him wrong in his venting, I just listened and waited and listened and waited. In the end, he thanked me for my time and for hearing him out. All he wanted was to be heard. What an easy gift I can give to a former employee in a difficult time. With this strategy, it’s possible to protect the company you work for while also providing space for dignity for the human on the other end of the phone.
If we practice this day after day with our teams, our employees and our leaders, we will see a remarkable difference in the response we receive. And, more importantly, we will provide a safe space for employees to express themselves and feel like they belong.
